Blog #5

Dr. Bearhugg: (2 rs? 2 gs?)

Lookin for a recipe for a bloody mary and meanwhile, the rest of this gig is looking for a recipe for an audience. Seriously, folks, please, please start showing up! These groups are slaying comedy poon left and right and twenty people are showing up. Dr Bearhugg is running with a really interesting concept about trying to find the cure for a hangover/psiorasis, Goodbar!, on the other hand, has already discovered the perfect recipe for a grilled cheese. This grilled cheese is very, very good. Three types of cheese and a great grain bread, my only complaint is that it's a little greasy. The fries are tasy and that only adds to the overall effect. The Doc Bearhugg member portraying "Tommy" is sporting a great northern 'Sconny accent/Rick Moranis Canuck accent. Doctor Bearhugg has wrapped and the show rolls on...


Erik (of TBR) is yammering on about not being able to do stand-up and I'm sure he's got nothing useful to add about "stand-up" as an artform. -- NOTE*: The ketchup for the fries taste suspiciously like cocktail sauce but it could be the Blue Moon fucking with my palate.-- Meanwhile, back at the ranch, Erik is still wandering and droning on about stand up and how he's got the roots for a swarm of "great" stand-up jokes. I staunchly disagree.


Unrelated:

Father-son duo stepping right up to the plate and talking about a new school a new state and "Hey, he's driving here!" These guys are talking about punching each other per discovering a new car, ie: "Slug Bug" "PT Cruiser Bruiser." And with the mention of the PT Cruiser I'm immediately reminded of the hilarious video by SweatHeart. Funeral puns in a funeral commercial? Now I've seen it all!

Overplayed Shakespeare? Some of this hits a note from high school but some of it is pretty funny. Really I can't wait to find out who the hell wiins the bottle of free champagne; merely so that I can snag some of that delicous nectar of the gods*.

Alright, for the third installment of the "Jerry Funeral Parlor" jokes, the youngster lost his kibble and bits for a second or two but well played Unrelated.

The Bryan Room:

Okay! first skit of the night from TBR this night was broken up by the oafish live-blogger popping open the bottle of champagne and scaring the bejesus out of TBR and amusing to no end the champagne winners, Anthony and Molly. A handsome couple if I've ever seen.

TBR now is inside of a hair salon and they're working on their respective do's and the things they've got to get done, and manlycure, "you know like a manicure for a dude." Erik, the mumbler, is trying really hard to get his taint waxed and now he wants to get a shave...Erik comes home from a haircut and feels like his barber hates him (big surprise) Ian, their roommates, cuts his own hair. I'm really wondering how the champagne drinkers are doing with their bottle, they're a little more than halfway done and I've explained that they need to drink faster because I time everybody who drinks a bottle of champagne (not really or at all) and now Anthony is fairly interested in winning the timed competition of drinking champagne that doesn't really exist...

Cowboy Don:

The boys from Donald Cowboy Ranch are in rarest of forms thus far...still loud and still hilarious.

There's this hugeass mirror behind me that I lean against every night while I'm liveblogging and I honestly get concerned every time the back of my head hits the mirror that I'm leaving a grease spot because I sweat so much on riding my bike over to Goodbar. I think it's sorta tricky to drink champagne really fast, BECAUSE if you drink too fast you get extremely "urpy" extremely quickly and right now I'm wondering, NO the duo of Molly and Anthony do not get "urpy" from drinking too quickly. They're both feeling "great" although "Tony," as I'm going to call him from now on, was quick to admit to feeling "buzzed" already and he was surprised by that. Remember, folks, these innocent champagne winners did not get to eat a terrific grilled cheese. Jesus! "terrific" is such a pain in the ass word to spell. Honestly, I always want to throw in the double "r" double "f" deal. Cowboy Don is rapping about the college experience. OK, here's the thing about this liveblog: there's no wifi. Jesus, is Pat from CD ever fucking loud.

SketchUp and Mustard:

Alright, this team has taken a suggestion from the crowd and it's "X" and "C," my spider-jokes about drug-sense is tingling!

So it looks like our champagne winner "Anthony" [Ed. if that's his real name!] is not only a connoseiur of terrible wines but also a member of SketchUp and Mustard. I don't use the term "Benedict Arnold" very often, in fact, this may be the first time; however! I'm dumbfounded by the treachery that our champagne winning SOB has maltreated the bond of trust that he and I had. I opened a bottle of bubbly for this charlatan! Had I known that he was a memeber of a comedy team I'd certainly have made him open his own bottle. My right arm is breaking out in some sort of minor and itchy rash and it's bugging the heck out of me. Not on a Abu Gharib level but still torturous. That liar "Anthony" at least seems to be suffering the most minor of effects from the champagne and I'm still utter shock at his level of deception, my faith in humanity? Consider it rocked!

*Not really nectar of the gods so much as it's a sparkling American white.